Little Evil (2017) 1h 34m

This is the third fuckin' horror movie I'm doing on here that has Adam Scott in it! Piranha, Krampus, and now the Netflix original, Little Evil!  Is he becoming the new Christopher Walken, popping up all over the place because he doesn't want to get bored?  I'm not complaining.  He became a boy mayor and blew the town's money on a giant winter sports complex named Ice Town!  And if you don't understand that then go watch Parks and Rec you uncouth fart!

Little Evil is a horror comedy based around the premise of The Omen... or maybe just an AC/DC album since the kid looks more like Angus Young than Damien.  Gary marries the woman of his dreams without having ever spent time with her son Lucas.  Lucas is literally the child of the devil, conceived through some strange cult ritual.  Gary just wants to be a good step-dad for his step-son, Lucas wants to bring about the apocalypse, the mother is oblivious.  It's a step-dad support group vs. a doomsday cult while Gary attempts to become the father he never had.

Netflix hasn't really been pumping out good content when it comes to their original horror films (ex: I Am the Pretty Thing That Lives In the House) but they do a much better job when it's a cross-up such as this.  It's like an America swing at making a film in the vein of Shaun of the Dead.  We get nods to The Shining, Poltergeist, and some Ghostbusters humor thrown in.  We're also treated to one of the best uses of Rush's "Tom Sawyer" for a device reveal.  I had a good time watching Little Evil.  It's one of those films where you could have some friends over, order some food, and make a Friday night of it.

I give Little Evil 3 copies of High Voltage out of 5:

[REC] 4: Apocalypse (2014) 1h 35m

I can't remember which of the [REC] series I've seen before. I'm pretty sure I haven't seen the original because it's either never on Netflix or costs way too much on DVD because it's a foreign film.  That's kind of a bummer though because it's supposed to be really good.  [REC] 4: Apocalypse though, questionable at best.

It starts with a group of military guys sweeping building and planting explosives.  They apparently are poorly trained as their sweeps don't show that there are fuck tons of zombies they missed which end up wrecking their lives.  One ends up finding our main reporter girl and they escape only to wake up on a ship with a bunch of caged monkeys, a small crew, military, and scientists?  I don't know what the hell happened.  Neither do they, so I guess we're all in the same... you know what... never mind.

The rest of the film is outbreak city followed by one of those "this person must have the cure! Get them!" shit for a good half of the movie.  This was actually pretty boring.  Also, that outboard motor she's posing with in that poster... it's a weapon.  Pretty much the dumbest weapon I've seen in a zombie movie because those things are heavy as fuck and don't have huge blades.  A boat full of guys with a ton of guns, and you mother fuckers find a dumb ass motor.

I think this is one of those points where a franchise has just gone on too long.  The fucking zombies Naruto run at them sometimes which instantly made me hate them.  Then the subtitles were not always correct.  I may not know much Spanish, but I know when someone says "you don't have the balls," as opposed to "I would like to see you try it."

This movie also started with some things I might have been reading into waaaaaayyyy too much.  For example, the ship's name is the Zarathustra which I assume was in reference to the Neitzsche book.  The radio/IT person was wearing a Nosferatu shirt and they're all on a boat with this "monster" plague.  I'm probably just trying too hard to save this film by wanting it to be smarter than zombies on a ship in Spanish.

I give [REC] 4: Apocalypse 2 "judges you in Spanish" memes out of 5:

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Day 11: What We Become (2015) 1h 25m

When I think of the general Norway/Sweden/Denmark area of Europe I tend to think about black metal, and ABBA, but mostly black metal.  So when I rolled the Danish film What We Become and saw this poster image I was hoping it was going to be bloody with satan and cool shit.  What I got was a 28 Days Later knock off.  So what I became was bored.

What We Become starts with a viral outbreak in a small city area.  It quickly becomes a militarized zone where those that turn are pulled out and taken somewhere to be killed and the survivors have to live just on small rations.  Shit goes down hard thanks to our "teenage" jagbag, Gustav, sneaking out and basically leading to things getting out of control way faster than normal time would allow.

These characters were lame.  The teens are oversexed and the parents appear absurdly laid back at times.  Gustav sucked so hard as a person that the greatest monster in this film is his sheer existence.  The course this film takes is just a slow crawl of what 28 Days... did much better.

Apparently this is the first "post-apocalyptic zombie" film to come from Denmark.  While I'd say this were more early-apocalypse than post-apocalyptic, I wish it would have been more inventive.  There were some good visual elements but at one point the windows to the outside world get blacked out and I assume that this was put in as a plot point only because they couldn't keep filming with the background showing people doing their normal life things and breaking the immersion.  I could be wrong, but it felt like that was the reason.

I give What We Become 1 copy of 28 Days Later out of 5: